Inquiring Minds Want to Know

There are lots of things I don't understand in this world. I won't jot down everything because I don't want you to think I'm a complete moron. But as I rode the train to work this morning I couldn't help pondering one of them.

Why do women shave off their eyebrows and then paint them back on?

I can understand trimming them up. I work with a fellow who could use his eyebrows to repel off of a building, so maintenance isn't an issue. I even understand if you've got lighter hair and want to darken them up a little. Make them stand out so people know when you're surprised or curious. But I just don't understand why you would remove all of the hair and then paint in a perfectly arced line to replace it. It looks really fake and honestly, it scares me a little bit.

This woman on the train looked like an average, office-working, condo-owning person. She could have eased up on the eye shadow a bit, but she looked well put together. Except she had no eyebrows! Just two brown (darker than her hair color) arcs over her eyes where the brows used to be. All I could think of was Ronald McDonald or Kabuki Theater or that horrible scene in Pink Flyod's The Wall. It made her face look plasticy. And I couldn't stop staring.

Look, I'm all for prettying yourself up. You do what you have to do to make yourself feel good. I get that. I used to have a mullet that I would pull back into a ponytail because I felt I looked cooler like that. Thinking back on it now I want to kick my own ass, but at the time I felt better about myself because of it. I can even understand why someone might opt for plastic surgery. But even then, it's a professional doing the work. And it's permenant. It isn't going to come off in the shower and need re-applied every day.

If there's anyone out there that could offer some insight on this issue, I would appreciate it. Maybe if I understand the motives behind it, I won't stare as much.